Re-Learn, Re-Try

O Lord, my God, help me with this fear of failure. With my impatience, which causes me to rush or give up midway… with my reluctance to bear the weight of life’s various crosses. Help me to find the purpose and sweetness in it all, when it brings me closer to You—the long-suffering Father, the Holy and Innocent One Who sacrifices Himself, the Spirit of Love that has no end.

I’ve been trying to numb my pain because the odds have been so overwhelming. Most of the time, I feel like I’m merely hanging by a thread. Perhaps I’m too cowardly and just making things more difficult for myself? My lack of child-like faith and my addictive attachments to the world have become more apparent. Please forgive me all my idolatries. I keep wasting time, senselessly wandering around to distract myself.

I want to hope in Your miracles again. Like with the recent overturning of Roe v. Wade, I want to believe that You go beyond all worldly probabilities and expectations. Your ways are not our ways (cf. Isaiah 55:8), so I ask that You re-train me to live for heaven. There’s a saint that You see in each of us, and only by Your grace can we bear any fruit that will last (cf. John 15:16).

Keep us spiritually safe, O Lord, and strengthen our resolve to follow, even if it hurts, even if it seems to come at great cost… I’m convinced that without You, there can be no true peace, joy, freedom, healing, or fulfillment. As omniscient God, You know the story’s goal; hence, I wish to focus on Your commands, Your directions, Your Holy and Creative Will. Please let it be so. Thank You for never giving up on me. Amen.

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